Finding it hard to manage your money as a single parent? Adjusting your money mindset can be more powerful than you think, says Carmen Campbell, a coach and advocate in wellbeing for single parents.
Right now might be a good time to hit the pause button and get mindful with your money.
We’re facing unprecedented times: the corporate world is in all sorts of pain and the stock markets are volatile.
So, if you’re feeling slightly anxious right now, you’re in good company.
Change is scary right?
Most of us will be impacted by this change, in one way or another. But, when we come out on the other side there will be much to enjoy again. It just might be different.
In the meantime, we stay at home. And here is where we get to choose. We get to prepare. We get to be proactive and make some choices that are the ultimate form of self-care.
I talk about self-care a lot with clients – and I’m really clear about it. Self-care for single parents is unique. Our needs can be complex or super simple. But they are rarely the same as the needs of others.
Looking after ourselves financially is one of the most important foundations of self-care for single parents. Why? Quite simply, because being in a stressful financial position affects everything in our lives; our mental health, our confidence as parents, our relationships with our children, our energy, and how we feel about ourselves in the broader context of our culture. So, it’s worth looking after, right?
Adjusting your mindset
What if we didn’t have to feel panic? What if we didn’t have to lie awake at night and worry about how the bills would get paid? What if we made mindful, kind decisions that were all acting to reduce the stress we felt? What if we felt in control and proud of how we manage our money?
Like a jigsaw puzzle with pieces that you lovingly put together, what if you had the clarity of thought to put your money into the things that you value most in your life? Like a home that’s full of love, or good food that nourishes your children’s development, or books that feed your mind.
So, in this time of great change, let’s get clear on what our values are and put a pause on everything else.
Right now, nothing has changed in my world. I’m still working (even though this is now at home) and financially things are the same. But, I know that might change so I’ve made some tweaks. I feel calmer for doing this.
Think about what you can pause right now.
Is that x, y, z you signed up to 12 months ago really aligned to your values?
How can you look at your spending and mindfully refine?
Finance experts (and I’m not one of them!) call this getting into defense mode. What they mean by this is cash flow is king.
What are the things you don’t need to spend money on right now? It might be your daily coffee, gym subscription, travel, and lunches out.
What have you got on automatic subscription that you don’t really need?
How can you simplify your day-to-day living? A vegetarian meal or a poached egg on toast for dinner can feel weirdly comforting right now)
If you’re facing a reduction in income due to Covid-19 and you rent your home, could you request a rent reduction or speak to your landlord about a rent payment holiday? If you have a mortgage, could you speak to your bank about a mortgage holiday?
Remember, this isn’t about going without, it’s about going within. Then aligning and refining what you really need right now.
About Carmen Campbell
Prior to being a single parent herself, Carmen indulged in 40 minutes of meditation a day, yoga a few times a week and annual meditation retreats in Bali. And then she had a baby, followed closely by a relationship breakdown, and her life was turned well and truly upside down. She realised pretty quickly that wellness for a single parent was a lot more of a challenge than she anticipated.
Ever since, Carmen has been on a mission to find her own personal wellness again – and in the process is redefining wellness for single parents.
She coaches clients to regain their emotional freedom, find their financial flow and develop respectful co parenting relationships – however bad the situation might be.
Carmen has a BA in psychology and is a certified Conscious Uncoupling Coach. She finds great purpose in coaching her clients to feel calm, connected and empowered in the life that they create.